attention issues etc

I've been running behind on blog entries, and there's so much more fun stuff to talk about, but right now I'm so frustrated!!!

I grew up with siblings with ADD/ADHD and a mom who was a special Ed teacher, and a lot of awareness and sympathy in general for all kinds of special needs.  I knew attention deficit disorders are inherited, so there was a good chance one of the kids would have some degree of it.  Yet I feel totally blindsided by Riley's transition the last few months, and very frustrated that even wading into the system I am already facing lots of hurdles.

Riley started his kindergarten year as the kid who was so focused and attentive that they put other kids next to him hoping they would be calmed by his influence.  He was friendly to everyone and so lots of different kids liked him and vice versa, and all the material seemed to be coming pretty easy to him.  After the middle of the school year, he started having more and more trouble staying focused and kept getting into trouble for not staying put, not staying quiet, not staying focused, and not listening when a grownup asked him to settle down.  He got some criticism for his handwriting and homework being too messy but otherwise was doing great, and got increasingly resentful about having to do homework, and complaining about going to school in the morning.  He's also been relying on clowning around to get kids to like him, and when they look at him funny or tell a teacher he's misbehaving, it's very hurtful to him.

Maybe a month ago I started talking with Jeff and other moms about it, and looked up the symptoms of ADHD, and was startled how well they matched.  I mentioned this to one of Riley's teachers, who kind of shrugged it off, saying she always managed hers well by eating less sugar and more protein.  Since she didn't respond in a way that was confirming his classrm behavior matched, I let it go, but continued to be frustrated by Riley wanting to be good, and trying really hard, but still not be able to do what all these grownups wanted of him.

Then last week, his other teacher asked if I was the one who wanted an SST done (a Student Success Team meeting to assess his needs) and I said that was probably a good idea.  Then today (after talking and reading more about ADHD in the last week) I brought it up again, and the teacher said to start with the pediatrician.  The pediatrician said "no, first you need to have a Connors assessment done by the school psychiatrist".  The school special education coordinator said "oh no, you can't have one of those done until you've done an SST, and that takes 60 school days, so it probably won't be done until September."  GRRRRR!

Riley wants so much to be good, and tries so hard to get it wrong over and over again!  I want to fix it, to help him, but now I feel like I'm totally on my own again.  It's so hurtful to him and to me as a parent who can't figure out how to make it better!

Off to get the kids to swim class - last one where they're all in the pool at the same time.  And we'll probably be late, and I'll be aggravated because I can't even yell at them to get them to move faster because of the lingering laryngitis.

bah.